emotionally healthy spirituality

When Langham Preaching’s Global Leadership Team meets, Lord-willing, in the UK in June it will be 1163 days since we’ve been in-person together.  During this covidian season we’ve gathered on Zoom for two hours a week, three weeks out of four.  We’ve grown closer together, while apart, for various reasons — most notably God’s gracious care for us which has helped keep us resilient.
But we’ve also read different books together…

Julyan Lidstone’s Giving Up the Purple: A Call for Servant Leadership in Hierarchial Cultures was one — and another one, which we’ve just finished, is Peter Scazzero’s Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

Scazzero’s thesis is there on the front cover, below the title: ‘it’s impossible to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature’.  At the heart of this journey is the embrace of a contemplative spirituality.  ‘The pathway to unleashing the transformative power of Jesus to heal our spiritual lives is found in the joining of emotional health and contemplative spirituality’ (37).  This is his point.
If you are like me, often needing the answers ‘in the back’ when it comes to word puzzles (although part of Wordle’s allure must be the way we need to persist because there are no answers ‘in the back’!), then let me direct you to ‘Appendix B — Defining Emotional Health and Contemplative Spirituality’ (212-213).  Very helpful.
Then coming back to the front and trawling the Table of Contents, we see just how probing the book is. For example:
  • Going Back in Order to Go Forward (on breaking the power of the past, especially family)
  • Journey through the Wall (referring to ‘the dark night of the soul’)
  • Enlarge Your Soul through Grief and Loss (on dealing with pain)
  • Discover the Rhythms of the Daily Office and Sabbath (on developing life-giving routines)
  • Growing into an Emotionally Mature Adult (on making peace and resolving conflict)
  • Go the Next Step to Develop a ‘Rule of Life’ (on bringing it all together in a plan)
There are a lot of issues in that list, aren’t there?  Scazzero’s easy writing style, filled with stories and vulnerability and wisdom, helps the reader negotiate the bumps and bruises, the falls and failures about which such trawling reminds us — and points us in the direction of health and maturity.

Wisdom

I appreciated the morsels of wisdom left here and there.  On dealing with the past, ‘family history lives inside all of us’ (75).  On measuring our level of brokenness, consider how freed we are from ‘judging others and how ‘offendable’ we are (109).  ‘Good grieving is not just letting go, but also letting it bless us’ (135).  On using the four principles of sabbath (stop, rest, delight, contemplate) ‘to structure our vacations’ (161) — and, I might add, maybe the younger New Zealander’s rite of passage, the OE (‘overseas experience’) which so often becomes a prodigal time.  ‘Jesus’ profound, contemplative prayer life with his Father resulted in a contemplative presence with people‘ (170, emphasis mine).  In the midst of conflict, ‘every time I make an assumption about someone who has hurt or disappointed me without confirming it, I believe a lie about this person in my head’ (181).  The “rule” in ‘A Rule of Life’ (‘that intentional, conscious plan to keep God at the center of everything’, 190) is more like a trellis, helping us ‘get off the ground and grow upward’ (190).  Yippee.  A gardening metaphor — they always work well.   ‘Most people live off other people’s spirituality’ (191).  I’ve noticed this one before as well.  It is a kind of vicarious spirituality which easily becomes vestigial, when what is needed is something more embryonic.

Wake-up

I found the book to be a wake-up call.  Our sudden dislocation from India, in combo with needing to work across time zones and finding it difficult to establish ourselves in community again after a decade focused elsewhere, has surfaced emotional vulnerabilities — while ‘contemplative spirituality’ easily becomes something of a faded photo.  I need a re-set.  Once upon a time I articulated, prayerfully and annually, my ‘rocks’ (like a ‘Rule of Life’, or trellis, for me) — but I haven’t done it recently.  Some features come easier than others — like solitude, waiting, simplicity and even blogging (emerging from a desire to share and to serve others).  But things like community, sabbath and prayer often remain a challenge…

Wondering

Reading the book with people from Canada, Bolivia, England, Ghana, Bosnia and Indonesia highlighted how some stuff does not cross-cultures that well at all (like the material on conflict) — and yet it was interesting how many of the issues were more universal.

The book does wander over into pop psychology every now and then.  ‘True freedom comes when we no longer need to be somebody special in other peoples’s eyes because we know we are lovable and good enough’ (53). Yikes.  Methinks a little dose of that supreme line in the hymnbook would help here: ‘make me a captive, and then I shall be free’.

It is my blog (!), so permit me to say that I wish people would stop using the Iceberg Model (17).  Why?  The iceberg cannot even illustrate the key point wanting to be made — namely, that what lies beneath determines so much of what lies above.  With an iceberg what lies beneath is just more ice.  The frigid blob is all the same stuff.  We need to trade in the iceberg for a newer model — like the model of a tree because, with its roots and fruits, it provides the perfect illustration of what is being affirmed.  

Melt the Iceberg.  Free the Tree.  Plus, a tree is everyday for people everywhere, while an iceberg assumes life in extreme latitudes, or frequent viewings of Titanic.


nice chatting
Paul

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About Me

paul06.16

the art of unpacking

After a childhood in India, a theological training in the USA and a pastoral ministry in Southland (New Zealand), I spent twenty years in theological education in New Zealand — first at Laidlaw College and then at Carey Baptist College, where I served as principal. In 2009 I began working with Langham Partnership and since 2013 I have been the Programme Director (Langham Preaching). Through it all I've cherished the experience of the 'gracious hand of God upon me' and I've relished the opportunity to 'unpack', or exegete, all that I encounter in my walk through life with Jesus.

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