Two years ago it was cancer that took the life of my best buddy from childhood – as well as being Best Man at each other’s weddings. This past week it was the death of Denise (once again to cancer), a precious friend and mentor whose orbit of influence was far wider than she ever realised.
Thankfully, I was able to get home to New Zealand for both funerals, with Barby joining me last week. It feels surreal, even odd, to walk into the family context when you’ve missed the final weeks and months of the journey. But God’s hand was so evident – be it by getting the final seats on planes or the family choosing, quite independently, the only day that could work for us.
gather to grieve together
remember, to give thanks & to celebrate together
life of Denise Edwards:
us – and in the service of Jesus.
mentor, a role model to a small multitude spread around the world
especially,
sister to four: Margie and Frank; John and Stella
Asher
Christina & Lito
… We are all here because we love you,
just as we love Denise.
we want to open our hearts, with you,
the promises of scripture
them
in the love and faithfulness of the living God.
is stronger than death.
all being brought to life.
us as we hear the promises of your word,
comfort they offer.
us as we sing the hymns which proclaim the great truths,
life they offer.
us as we linger with this community of family and friends,
love they offer.
giver of hope:
us with joy and peace in believing
may be dispelled,
loneliness eased,
our hope reawakened.”
the receptionist with Dr Niva Thakurdas,
we awaited the birth of our firstborn.
and I worked together in the Extension Studies Department
highlight of these years was pizza on the floor as two families
the first night in their new home in Poinsettia Place.
together in LeaDev-Langham
years – Rod & Denise have travelled to SAIACS in Bangalore
we are based) … and how precious now is the memory
away
introducing them to their first dosa.
the cancer was diagnosed – I saw Denise only the once
was the day, as the treatment intensified, when she picked out a wig
looked beautiful and rather pleased with herself…
cherished these intersecting chapters of life,
for me a woman of grace and truth.
was seen
her kindness, her gentleness, her empathy
particularly in the way she locked-in as a listener,
else.
always unconditional.
advocate, a champion.
on my side.
to do in her company,
that buttressed me
keep going.
hopeful, enthusiastically warm
was seen
honesty, to accuracy, to authenticity.
transparent in the way she related
me,
myself,
me to be.
you had a wee moan with Denise about something or someone,
you expressed a workplace despair…
of the way forward will be to live the truth in that situation,
freedom to be found in doing so.
things…
proof-read,
right.
could be seen in the big things:
developing policies around HR and governance
systems
with Denise and you journey towards
and authenticity and accuracy
because
she was a woman of truth.
lived her life, Denise was filling with grace and truth,
at her, linger with her & you glimpse
Jesus, who himself was full of grace and truth, at work in her.
and me in these ways,
touched hers in these ways.
was a channel, enabling her to be a friend and a leader
far greater influence than she ever realised.
Later on, during the eulogies, I was asked to share about our time working together at BCNZ/Laidlaw College. One area came quickly to mind:
learned a lot about leadership from Denise in those years.
thing stands out – and remains with me for always, I hope.
importance of valuing people,
institution/community
Not for Denise…
and policies need to be found
help these people to shine and to succeed as well.
is the key towards building happy, harmonious communities.
time, I’ve discovered that Denise was tapping into
principles Paul talks about with the body in 1 Corinthians 12
themselves to be dispensable
treat them as indispensable
to have less honour
treat the with a special honour.”
is what lay behind – and united – her commitment to Building Self-Awareness, to Human
Resources, to Career Planning and to Good Governance.
effective in these areas
people thrive.
[As a homily I switched the gender and went for a ‘nana’s benediction’ from Gen 48.15-16].
 |
| With Denise in Ooty (Nilgiri Hills, India) three years ago. We are outside St Stephen’s Church where our first boss (at BCNZ), Ian McCleary, married his wife, Jenny. |
nice chatting about Denise, even amidst the sadness
Paul
PS (much later) … our daughter, Bethany, was going through her wedding photos and found this lovely shot of herself in conversation with Denise, just a matter of days before Denise was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
About Me
the art of unpacking
After a childhood in India, a theological training in the USA and a pastoral ministry in Southland (New Zealand), I spent twenty years in theological education in New Zealand — first at Laidlaw College and then at Carey Baptist College, where I served as principal. In 2009 I began working with Langham Partnership and since 2013 I have been the Programme Director (Langham Preaching). Through it all I've cherished the experience of the 'gracious hand of God upon me' and I've relished the opportunity to 'unpack', or exegete, all that I encounter in my walk through life with Jesus.
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